“For it is you who light my lamp; the Lord my God lightens my darkness.” ‭‭Psalm‬ ‭18‬:‭28‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I genuinely didn’t understand how I ended up here; one moment I was okay, and then I found myself in complete darkness. I’ve been praying and reading my Bible, thinking I was prepared to avoid this situation. You might wonder what happened—I'm glad you asked. Darkness often occurs when we fall prey to the flesh, and before we realize it, we start complaining, losing sight of gratitude. I see now that I was quick to anger, and I’m learning to be kinder to myself during this struggle.

But being kind to myself doesn't mean ignoring the darkness; it means remembering who holds the flashlight.

When anger and complaints take over, they act like a spiritual blindfold. We become so focused on what is going wrong, or how unfair a situation feels, that we accidentally block out the very light we’re praying for. I realized that my daily Bible reading hadn’t failed me—I had simply stopped applying the peace I was reading about the moment frustration hit the door.

If you find yourself in a similar dark season, wondering how you slipped up despite your best efforts, here is what the darkness is teaching me:

Grace requires room to breathe. God doesn’t expect perfection; He desires a broken and contrite heart. Admitting you lost your footing is the first step back onto solid ground.

Gratitude is a weapon. You cannot complain and worship at the same time. The quickest way to pierce through the darkness is to start thanking God for what is right, even when everything feels wrong.

The darkness is temporary. Just because you tripped doesn't mean you're lost. The same God who was with you in the light is waiting to guide you out of the shadows.